Regulars

Some shoppers at our store have been given nicknames for their quirky and sometimes downright bizarre behavior. Today I saw-
Eyebrow Lady aka Pineapple Lady. She is quite elderly and wears a curly wig. Her eyebrows are drawn on. She is famous for returning used items directly to the shelf and taking what she wants to replace them. She never has a receipt and gets very offended when asked for one. She will dump out an entire bag of cherries into the bin and pick out a few that she likes. She seems to have a fascination with pineapple. She will pick up each package and turn it over to see if it leaks. If it doesn't leak right away she will give it a good shaking. She will come up to the checkstand and complain that all the pineapples leak. She leave them all upside down in the cooler so they can leak some more. If she does take one home she will bring it back the next day complaining that it leaked juice all over her refrigerator. She will go to the produce department and get another one, after shaking them all and leaving them upside down in the cooler.
She will stand at the end of the express checkstand and ask to be waited on right away, no matter how many people are in line. I always tell her that she can get into line and I will help her as soon as I can. She says she can't wait and leaves all her items on my counter in a huff, if I am lucky. Other times she will stay and complain that all the checkers are useless and no one ever helps her.
Not sure what the story is there. She seems pretty crazy, but she never seems to get any better or worse, so I don't think it is progressive dementia or Alzheimer's. The scariest part? She still drives her own car.